It comes and goes

Each morning
I awake with a whole bed
and soon notice
the flutter of wings outside
the many chirps of my hungry cat
the bed used to be half
and the kettle would boil
drowning the noise of the begging cat
and birds on early commute
we never stayed in after sleep
preoccupied with a day's affairs
(like boiling the kettle)
when we could've done
this or that
held each other even for a bit
time surely didn't help
I wanted you around always
my stubbornness wouldn't budge
for me
or for us
I still don't know how you felt
can't stop thinking now
with each sunrise
with each song I played on our drives
it pains me to think
but I can't stop
indulging in what you loathed...
solitude
and drinking my soul away
and filling my lungs with dust
through many night falls
that the white floating rock looks down over me
but with an empty smile